Hello guest.. If you are a guest to the forum, you may use the guest lounge at the top of the page prior to registering to ask questions, place comments, request an account to be activated, etc. Enjoy your stay.

Site Donations
If you wish to help out the forum, click below.
Latest topics
» the last person to post here wins
Fri Dec 26, 2014 10:20 am by fleamailman

» Happy Birthday Jyo
Wed Nov 16, 2011 12:35 pm by Johnywilko

» Try and guess who I am
Tue Jul 13, 2010 8:50 pm by Sima

» bitch
Tue Jul 13, 2010 8:47 pm by Sima

» Call Of Duty 5
Sun Jun 27, 2010 12:18 pm by Briane240

» new thing
Sun Jun 27, 2010 12:13 pm by Briane240

» Fleamailman
Sat Apr 17, 2010 4:46 pm by einsteinean

» I need help!
Mon Feb 01, 2010 6:25 pm by Marshazzle

» Would you rather?
Sun Jan 10, 2010 11:13 am by Sima

Navigation
 Portal
 Index
 Memberlist
 Profile
 FAQ
 Search
August 2017
MonTueWedThuFriSatSun
 123456
78910111213
14151617181920
21222324252627
28293031   

Calendar Calendar

Myninjakiwi
Never played mynk? Why don't you give it a go? Click below.
Fox Network
Feel like watching some of the best shows? Fox is the answer.
Mozilla FireFox
Easy download for the best internet browser.
ImageShack
A great way to upload and edit your pictures.
YouTube
Great way to watch and upload your videos.
Apple
Includes free downloads and itunes!
Singing Box
A great way to download music by artist or song free!!
Hypercam 2
Start making videos today with a free hypercam download!
NOAA Weather
Includes national and local weather reports and more!!
Yiwu

The Guardian

 :: Forum :: Stories :: Written Stories

View previous topic View next topic Go down

The Guardian

Post by Marshazzle on Fri May 22, 2009 7:42 pm

This is just a sneak peek of a new story I have been writing for a while now, hope you enjoy Very Happy

Mt. Everest, 9:00 EST, Oct. 5, 2030
His hand trembled grasping for a ledge above his forhead. Every cell in his body seemed to shake in fear, but excitment for the gracious climb. Reaching for a rock above him a thornbush abovehand latched onto his plaid jacket nearly ripping it. He held on for dear life using his other hand as a utensile. He delatched the thorns and continued as the sky started to cry. Tears flowing down the rock walls making it harder to climb the ledge. One arm slipped in a instance as he wrapped his leg around a nearby plant root sticking out of the moist rock. He cried out for what he though couldn't hear him in pain and misery. "Lord, why must you take this uppon me, stop the rain at once!" He almost couldn't hang on much longer, shaking to the point of dispare he held on as if hislife depended on it. And that it did. Nothing seemed to matter as if time passed through his brain focussing on every move he made, for one could cost his life, his only life. Wiping the tears from his eyes onto his jacket now with a tear in it he continued. The rain now drizzling for about 20 minutes had passed in his shortage. When he reached a fairly lardge ground, he stopped for a few minutes to rest his mind. His adrenaline and insanity boosted in unbeleif for he could have just died and nobody would be there to hear a sound. If a tree fell and nobody was there to see it, would it make a sound, they say? If only one man strideth on the Earth, would he be able to keep conversation? He fell asleep with these thoughts wondering around in his endless list of worries and droughts.... "Keep me safe" He mumbled under his breath, "Keep me safe."
He was shortly woken to a loud crack that echoed from the sides of the canyon below. He opened his eyes. If I was to die, where would I wither upon? Where would my final destination expose? "Questions of nonsense" He quickly shouted, now realizing his ledge was a collapse. "Lord!" The rock cracked farther to the point of surrender. His big life depending on one small crack. He stood still crying as any human would, for that is one of the emotions humans were born with and we cant change. Weeping and depression became himself whispering, "No, no... no...." With that, the ledge came loose and the helpless wonderer fell to the death of himself. As he fell he closed his eyes knowing not what lie ahead. The ledge skimming his head as he fell along with dirt chunks that smashed against his head. Bloody and bruised he fell and let his arms dangle out, "Take me! Take me!"
*BAM!*
To be continued?

That was just 1 1/2 pages of rthe story, i may realease more to you later, because im already on page 71. Anyways, hope you enjoyed, Very Happy
avatar
Marshazzle
Thunder Hawk
Thunder Hawk

Posts : 705
Age : 22
Location : My Location? Screw It.
User Points : 1792
My Mood :

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: The Guardian

Post by Jyo on Thu Jun 04, 2009 12:38 pm

Nice opening. When you finish your novel, i'd suggest you seek professional opinions prior to publishing the story.
avatar
Jyo
Devil's Hornet
Devil's Hornet

Posts : 450
Location : Drunk...how the hell am i supposed to know?
User Points : 369
My Mood :
Extra Ranks :


View user profile http://jyoforumns.forumotion.net

Back to top Go down

Re: The Guardian

Post by Boxman on Thu Jun 04, 2009 12:57 pm

Not something i'd read. I'm not the reading type. :/

_________________
avatar
Boxman
Assassin
Assassin

Posts : 1033
Location : Like a boss.
User Points : 1396
My Mood :
Extra Ranks :


View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: The Guardian

Post by Marshazzle on Thu Jun 04, 2009 12:58 pm

Thanks Jyo, and yeah, Boxy, you don't seem a reading type Wink
avatar
Marshazzle
Thunder Hawk
Thunder Hawk

Posts : 705
Age : 22
Location : My Location? Screw It.
User Points : 1792
My Mood :

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: The Guardian

Post by Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

View previous topic View next topic Back to top

- Similar topics

 :: Forum :: Stories :: Written Stories

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum